Yesterday while driving the kids to their cousins' house for a night of frolicking, my daughter pulls out a sucker that she had stashed somewhere in the car seat. A reward for having a good day at school the day before(yes the teacher also knows how to bribe children). One sucker, two kids spells disaster. Genuine Boy was not going to take this lying down.
"Mommy I wan candy too!" he screeched.
"I don't have any Candy sweetie", she calmly replied. Wrong answer.
Genuine Boy unleashed the weapon. A repeat of the sentence until he gets what he wants. "Mommy I wan candy.....I wan candy...I wan Candy...."
Me being the diplomat came up with a solution. "Genuine girl? Can you share with Genuine Boy and give him a lick of your sucker?"
"EEWWW! He would get it all germy and yucky!", she said in disgust. Of course she was right, and I let the matter drop. Meanwhile Genuine Boy was uping the ante with increased volume in his plea "I WAN CANDY....I WAN CANDY!"
Mrs. G was frantically searching her purse for a tidbit of something to appease the demands from the back seat. Not even a Tic Tac could be found. I began to panic and looking on the floor for an old piece of candy or anything resembling a piece of candy. In our car, you can just about find anything, half full sippy cup, oddball cereal, smashed Nutrigrain bars. I'm never really worried about being caught in a blizzard.
"Give him a cinnamon Altoid" I said with a look of triumph on my face.
"You want him to scream louder?" Mrs. G snapped back. "Remember? That's HOT CANDY"
"Oh yeah, let's not give him that" I remembered. At this point I'm thinking of throwing the sucker out the window and trying to explain to Genuine Girl my irrational behavior. She is 16 months ahead of Genuine Boy and understands her Daddy.
Finally...a small package of peanuts was found in the car. "Thankoo Mommy." He said in a sugary sweet voice. I have now surmised that he can change character for his needs far to easy.
"Whew, Honey you saved the day. I hope he likes them" I said.
"Well I wasn't going to give him one of the rice krispy treats from my purse!" she exclaimed.
Funny about pregnant women. They don't share their stuff.
Hey, there was only one Rice Krispy treat. Why should I share my one true love? I was only thinking of Genuine Boy's little brother. He's really the one that likes them!! Besides he didn't know it was even an option. And yea don't mess with the pregnant lady! I love krispy treats!:)
There is a law that says pregnant women do not have to share with anyone else ... doesn't matter if they are an adult or a child. There really is. :)
I believe there's also a law somewhere stating that questioning a pregnant woman about her lack of sharing is out, too.
I do believe you are right, Shylah! That is a punishable offense! :)
Wonder what punishment MrsG will have for Geniune??? LOL
there are actually people who don't know these things? Pregnant women are the bosses of everyone and everything! duh!
1. Not only do they NOT have to share, or even let on that there IS something to share, they are entitled SNATCH anything that looks enticing from a child with an exclamation of, "Oh, honey, look! There's dirt all over this and I don't want you to get sick! Daddy will find you something better when we get home." And then use the front seat headrest to disguise the fact that you are stuffing it into your own face.
2. If a pregnant woman announces she is hungry in the car, do NOT scrounge around for something to placate her, do NOT ask if she can wait until you reach the destination, do NOT attempt to distract her. Get off the road, man, and find that woman something to eat.
3. I think I have covered the most important points, but for good measure, please go back and read items 1 and 2 one more time. And then go ask your wife if you can get her anything to eat.
That's right Mrs. G. You tell him. You don't have to share right now. Come on now Genuine. Let the lady have her treats in peace!
Pregnant women are not women to muck with, seriously, been there, done that, like 4 times, I know! *LOL*
I have to add this to Mindy's list...
4. Everything on her plate belongs to her and no one else can have any.
5. Anything on hubby's plate belongs to her too if she so chooses to claim it.
You men really must understand and grasp these rules asap so you won't loose as many fingers in the learning process. =]
I had something really profound and funny to say but by the time I got to the end of your post I forgot what it was. I think that's a sign that it's past my bedtime! LOL at MrsG not sharing her treat. I can totally identify and I'm NOT pregnant! Lol
Add to the above:
There is no such thing as a "silly" craving. Every craving is to be taken seriously as if it were a life or death matter. It may be - yours.
Screw sharing! Sharing is for dorks.
Oh and my co-wroker made some homemade bread today and he had the gall to tell me that the bread was good enough and didn't need any of the butter that was sitting out on the counter....
What is he new or something!!??
I'll put butter on my butter if i want to, thank you very much!!
Us preggos ARE the bosses of everything.