These two words carry with them a wide array of emotions. Some can hope never to hear those two words, while others rejoice in the news. I can still remember those words as they were told me one winter day in January 1999. It was very soon after our New Year’s Eve party and I thought it odd that my wife had passed out so easily and that she threw up so violently for days after. That was one of the worst hangovers I had ever seen I thought at the time. Not very long after, she gave me the news. She uttered those two words.
We were only dating at the time and had not yet wed. We seemed to have done everything in the wrong order back in those days. We had gone on a honeymoon type cruise before that , then came baby in a baby carriage, then we were married four months later. This was very cool roller coaster ride for me. I look back on it now with fond memories, but as it related to those two words on that fateful day I can only hope to express how I felt that day.
People talk about that “burning bush” moment or that touched with the hand of God moment. This is what it felt like for me. Like the seen “Raiders of the Lost Ark” when the bolt of light went through the bodies of the German soldiers, I too was floored by that beam of light. The difference is I didn’t die. I was taken to a place of serenity, of warmth and a feeling of being uplifted. My prayers for so many years had been answered in two small words. I had truly been touched by the hand of God. He smiled along with me that day. I cannot better describe the feeling.
I also saw Mrs. G in a whole different light. Sure she was my best friend, my confident, and lover. Now she had added a new category to her meaningfulness in my life. She was going to be the mother of my blessing, the bringer of my gift and the messenger of my answer to prayers. If you are a mother or even an expectant mother, ask the father of your child to explain the feeling he had when you uttered those two words. I would bet he has a hard time describing it in a single sentence. As I look back on this post, it does not do justice to my feelings, but I cannot put to words the miracle of that day.
[Photo courtesy of Pink Moose]
I was going through my search feeds this morning and ran across something that caught my eye. Not because it was about the lovely and overall hotness of Eva Longoria, although that in itself may be enough to get my attention, but the headline of the post.
Eva Longoria Parker “Desperately” Wants A Baby, Producer Says
Yes, even I read The Celebrity Baby Blog, if nothing more than to find out that celebrities have a tough time raising kids. Well that is not usually what gets reported but you and I know better. The post title used apparently the quote from the producer.
Desperate. I never thought of having babies and the word desperate in the same sentence. Don’t get me wrong I know of many people that for one reason or another cannot have children. In fact, I read many infertility blogs about parents that have tried and failed to have children. The notion of that breaks my heart.
In my first marriage, both of us wanted children. We were both healthy adults and both prepared for our world as parents. For nearly seven years we tried. We tried ovulation charts and rhythm methods and many other tactics, even standing on your head just to see if it worked. This was all to no avail. I suppose it was a blessing as I later became divorced and would never speak another word to my ex-wife after that time. It was like a bad dream and a chapter in my book to get to the next and better part of my life.
Mrs. G and I never had a problem with the notion of conception. We often joked that every time my wife did the laundry, she turned up pregnant. No, that doesn’t mean that my wife only did laundry once a year. Nearly all of our married life was spent birthing our four children. I think we still need to figure out a way to be a married couple and not be pregnant, which in itself is an entirely whole other blog post.
Desperate. Why Eva is their desperation to have a child? Are we trying to keep up with the rest of the crowd in Hollywood? It seems that the new black is pregnancy these days. Do you think that a child and baby is going to fill a void in you and make you a whole person? If that is the case I’ll pray for you as you perhaps have more issues than you realize.
Having a child is a miracle. It is a blessing. God will provide that miracle and blessing when the time is right. In my first marriage, the time was not right. In my life with Mrs. G every time she did laundry the time was right. To my friends that are having problem with infertility, there is always a reason. Perhaps not the reason you may agree with, but there is a reason. All of you will be loving parents if the child comes as easy as mine have or if you must adopt or have other measures to accomplish your goals. Never be desperate, but know that when a child comes and you hold them for the first time, the only thing that remains desperate in your world is the health, the safety, and the welfare of that child.
Pull out your number 2 pencils and put all of your materials under your seats, we have a little pop math quiz.
Here is the first question:
1. If you have two chocolate chip cookies and three children. Who gets to eat the cookies?
2. It takes 30 minutes to give four children a bath and it is 12:30 p.m. in Denver (MST). You have to be at a birthday party at 1:30 p.m. When do you start giving the children their baths.
3. Your wife has not had her period in 29 days, and she normally is like clockwork but is now at least three days late. At what point and on what day do you begin to panic?
For those of you that get all three questions correct, I might share a cookie!